Listening to: stay awake by example
Huh, okay, the last time I updated anything was in April 2011. So I've been away for quite a while. Mostly I've been chilling on LiveJournal which is a soul-consuming website if there ever was one.
That's not the only reason why I've been gone, though. I still draw. I haven't taken any artistic/decent photos in a while, but I still love photography. My love for art hasn't changed, so I hope you didn't think I just got tired of art and decided to do something else.
Basically, the thing is, I'm depressed. Not in an I'll cry for a couple of hours and then I'll be good again kind of way, but in an actual I am depressed way. I've been feeling more and more sad ever since last summer: I reckon there's something wrong when it's Midsummer and everyone else is partying and your parents are on a vacation in Berlin while you're in the bathroom cutting yourself. I'm not sad all the time, obviously -- I can still make horribly inappropriate jokes and have moments of genuine happiness and all, it's just that I cry every single day and sometimes I skip school because I just can't get out of bed or because everyone else at uni is so much smarter than me and I don't even know what to do with my life. It gets really bad sometimes.
I haven't been able to do artsy things as much as I'd like, and I've pretty much lost all faith in my skills, so that's why I haven't been around. I just can't deal with anything these days.
Yeah. So that happened.
I hope you guys are okay.
I'm trying to lurk around dA more and maybe upload something in the near future. Can't promise, though.
PS. I'm not going to kill myself.